Sunday, June 28, 2009

R.I.P. Billy Mays

Billy Mays, the burly, bearded television pitchman whose boisterous hawking of products such as Orange Glo and OxiClean made him a pop-culture icon, has died. He was 50.

Via Yahoo News

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Or, You Could Use It as a Hammer to Kill Yourself

Here's another gadget that would look great in your local landfill. It's a long-handled salt and pepper shaker and it's aimed squarely at lazy wimps.

Seriously? When is the last time you got burned sprinkling salt on your grilled chicken? Is your grill that big? Or are you that short?

I especially love how there are no covers for the openings. Hold it with the salt side up and you're peppering the floor. Hold it with the pepper side up, and you're getting salt in your shoes. Hold it sideways, and you'll just look ridiculous.

It's just so. well. thought. out.

BBQ Salt & Pepper shaker has a VERY l-o-o-o-ng reach! Now you can easily season foods cooking on your grill without tricky maneuvers and risks of burns. Dual-sided “mallet” with 21 1/4" long handle holds both salt and pepper in one—no more fumbling with separate shakers! Easy-to-fill shaker has 4 oz. capacity. Stainless steel. $12.98

Friday, June 12, 2009

Strike a Pos...ter.

So, I was in an "artsy" mood today and went over to I did a search for Art Deco, then drooled over a poster from the movie Metropolis.

After that, I did a search for "Madonna." The requisite album covers and concert pics showed up.

And then I saw this:

The price? $99.99 for an 18x24 unframed print.

Okay, what the hell is going on here? You have to be a special kind of rabid stalker fan to spend over $100.00 on a non-framed, non-autographed picture of Madonna's face smashed into Gwyneth's ear.

I'm pretty sure Madonna would kick the photographer in the balls if she knew he didn't delete this shot immediately after taking it.

Attention LIFE Magazine: this is called an "outtake." In other words, you "take" it "out" of the camera and forget it ever happened. Thank you.

Actress Gwyneth Paltrow and Singer Madonna Embracing. From the archives of LIFE magazine, this image is digitally printed on high gloss premium photographic paper resulting in a unique silver pearlescent finish with stunning visual impact and depth that is suitable for museum or gallery display. $99.99

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

DIY Shit on a Stick!

Traditional cakes are boring and predictable. They require agonizing measuring, mixing, cutting and serving, with everyone sitting around the same table, using plates, forks and your best disposable napkins.

Who has time for all that?

The revolutionary Cakesicle Pan finally makes cake portable! Simply look into your crystal ball to determine how many you'll need to bake, then carefully pour the cake batter into the awkwardly shaped holes. Once baked, then you can painstakingly decorate each one individually. "Uh-oh, Little Bobby is allergic to chocolate. Let's make one for him with coconut on it."

And finally, watch with delight as the kids run amok all over your house, spilling bits of cake and frosting all over the floor! Wouldn't that be fun?

And the fun continues into the next day, when you're scrubbing smashed sprinkles and frosting out of your carpeting and pulling whole, uneaten cakesicles out from under the couch. Fun! Yaaaaaay!

Also great for weddings in place of the traditional, overpriced wedding cake!

Cakesicle Pan bakes 8 mini cakes at a time, slip in wooden sticks (included) and decorate with colorful, tasty frostings and sprinkles! Heavy gauge, dishwasher safe, non stick coated steel, 1/2 x 15 x 10"' includes 25 wood sticks. $19.98

Think Pink

BECKY: Like, God. I had the worst day at my labor camp today. It was such torture. They made me do work! I had to do something called 'fo-to copying!'(sobs)

LINDSAY: Oh, Becky, that's awful!

BECKY: And the worst part? Like, I had to sit through this horrible meeting for almost half an hour! And it was just like 'blah, blah, blah, numbers, figures, statistics, layoffs, ethics...blah, blah, blah!

LINDSAY: Oh, poor thing. Do you want me to call Daddy's lawyer?

BECKY: And, like, my Starbucks got cold? And, like, I think my lipstick was smudged, but I couldn't go to the bathroom and I forgot my Coach bag at my desk!

LINDSAY: That is just terrible! If only there was a way to check your lipstick during a meeting, but like, you know, discreet? Like, if you could like, bring some kind of spy device with you? That no one would know about?

BECKY: That's hot. But it should be pink and covered with fake gemstones.

LINDSAY: Awesome.

"Bling" mirror mug lets you enjoy a hot beverage while checking on makeup or hair at a moment's notice. It's a picture-perfect stylized solution for multitaskers who are on the go, stuck in meetings or behind a desk. Plastic, 3 1/4 x 3 1/4 x 7 1/2". $8.98