Friday, August 01, 2008

Sometimes It's Better to Blend In

Because customs agents are such a cheerful, fashionable bunch:

The Victoria's Secret Passport Cover.


I would imagine that this is not going to impress the burly man (or woman) checking your documents at customs. This is only going to piss off them off even more.

Here is what you think will happen when you buy this:

BRENDA, CUSTOMS AGENT: Passport, please.

IDIOT: Here you go (hands over passport in pink case).

BRENDA: Oh, my God. This is so cute. Oh...wow. I can't! Hey, Jenny! Come over here! Look at this. (Jenny leaves her post, rushes over)

JENNY: (squeals) OH. My God! Where did you get that?

IDIOT: (flips hair over her shoulder) Victoria's Secret dot com! And it was only twelve dollars!

AGENTS: Get OUT!

IDIOT: I know! You like?

BRENDA: I have to get this.

IDIOT: So...can I go through?

BRENDA: Oh, yeah. Just go through. Thanks, sweetie!

And here's what will really happen:

BOB: Passport, please.

IDIOT: Here you go.

BOB: Ma'am, what in the hell is that?

IDIOT: Um, my passport?

BOB: Ma'am, Federal Law does not permit passports to be covered in overpriced plastic cases. Please remove your passport from its case.

IDIOT: Oh. I'm sorry. (fumbles with case) Ooh, this is not so easy....I'm sorry. (pulls out passport) Here you go.

BOB: Okay, ma'am. You've been selected for random additional screening. Please go behind that curtain and remove your clothes.

Passport cover. Protects your ID in the poshest case possible. "Love Victoria's Secret" message inside. Exclusively for Victoria's Secret. Imported PVC. Leopard-print lining only in pink raspberry, red and silver. $12.

2 comments:

Angela said...

You know you want one... LOL

joe*to*hell said...

brillllliant