Friday, May 23, 2008

Lazy, Totally Lazy

I have not had a truly lazy item come across my desk in a long time. And you've got to be truly lazy (and stupid) to consider this waste of plastic: The motorized martini shaker, which, when you break it down, is actually a glorified paint shaker, commonly used in hardware stores. It's designed to save you from "the hassle of shaking."

Jesus Lazy Christ.

Attention American Consumers: No bar I have ever entered used a motorized martini shaker. Ever. They are like unicorns. They only exist in the minds of children and childlike, stupid adults.

What annoys me is the whole "retro" look of this thing, as if they really existed back in the 50s and are making a huge comeback. I'm surprised that there is no James Bond reference in the description.

A well equipped bar just isn't complete without a quality cocktail shaker. The preferred utensil for restaurant and bar professionals everywhere -— you'll be amazed how easy it is to make perfectly mixed drinks! Simply press a button to start the mixing action, and you are on your way to an expertly shaken cocktail. With a removable cap and an easy pour spout, the Retro Series™ Martini Shaker allows you to effortlessly make the martini of your choice without the hassle of shaking. $59.99

Big thanks to Neil Russell for the tip!

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