Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Why Italy May Nuke Us One Day

"Appian Way Pizza complete with crust mix and sauce. Create your own pizzaria style pizza at home."

I was grocery shopping in Queens when this, the Mac n' Cheese equivalent of pizza, caught my eye. I gasped out loud and grabbed the box off the shelf, eyes wide with excitement. The other customers looked at me like I was off my meds, but I didn't care. (Look at that picture. Have you ever seen something so sad in your life?) I scrambled to write the name down on my shopping list. I put the box back on the shelf and wondered why anyone would ever consider trying this ketchup n' cardboard pizza "kit", especially in New York City.

Once home, I searched for this online. Oddly, this is available in bulk via Amazon.com. The three glowing reviews (please go there and see them) make me immediately suspect that they are written by the same person. (Sample: "My parents used to make this pizza every Friday night. It was the highlight of the week, and has contributed to my genuine love of pizza.)

Back in high school, I personally witnessed a kid drop his pizza face-down on the floor. He picked it up and ate it. If I had to choose between that and this, I'll take my chances with the floor.

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